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It's hard to be different in our culture.
We have pressure all around us to be like everyone else. Even though it may seem
like everyone is sexually attracted to the opposite sex, this is not true. Some
people are homosexual: they are attracted to people of the same sex. In some
countries like Canada and the United States, there are gay men and lesbians in
every occupation, leading successful lives.
When most of a person's sexual thoughts and
activities are about people of the same sex, this person may be homosexual.
Women who are sexually attracted to other women are called lesbians. Some people
use the word "gay" to include both male and female homosexuals, but usually it
is used for men only. People who are sexually attracted to members of the
opposite sex are heterosexual, sometimes called "straight". Some people are
attracted to both people of the same sex and the opposite sex; these people are
bisexual.
People may feel
strongly attracted to a person of the same sex. Someone can think and fantasize
about people of the same sex without necessarily being homosexual. Young people,
especially, need to explore their feelings.
Just because you are attracted to a person
does not mean that you have to have sex with them. You may admire the person and
or have a loving, caring, sharing relationship without sex. You do not have to
be sexual with anyone until you are ready.
The stereotypes of homosexuals on television or in
movies bother many people. Most gays and lesbians do not look or act any
different from anyone else.
We do not know why people are heterosexual, homosexual or bisexual.
There are many theories but no clear answers. Many people have sexual fantasies
about both sexes, and sometimes feel confused about whether they are gay or
straight. With time and sometimes help from others, most people can sort out
their feelings and sexual orientation.
If you think that you are gay or lesbian,
it may be hard to tell others about your sexuality. You may feel afraid of
losing friends or family members or your job. However, it may be a huge relief
to tell even one person. But don't rush into it. Tell someone you really trust.
And remember that it may take time for people to adjust and to deal with the
news.
"Coming out" or
telling others that you are homosexual is a life-long process; it's never
finished. As you become more self- confident it will be easier to tell others.
There might be support groups that you can join in your
community.
If you are a parent or a friend of someone
who has told you they are homosexual, you might feel disappointed, upset or
worried. Try to deal with the news in a way which tells the person that you
still love them and care for them. As a parent, you may have plans for your
child's life, and this wasn't part of your plans. But being gay or lesbian isn't
bad. Homosexuals are not sick and they don't need to change or be cured. It is
important to support your child or friend now. That person trusts and respects
you enough to confide in you. They need you. Your love and understanding will
help them accept themselves as they are.
There are books on this subject. It may
help to talk to someone you trust.You can also call a local Planned Parenthood
organization or Public Health Unit.
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